Month: January 2019

6:30 PM – This evening, Mom has had “critters” on the brain again. This time it’s been about various lights in the house. It’s been: “What’s those lights?” That’s just lights on the Modem to let me know that the internet is working. “What’s that red light?” That’s just a light on a power strip letting me know that it has power. “Is that flashing light an alarm?” Alarm for what? “Critters!” No, that’s just letting me know that a battery is done charging. “Is there some significance to this hazy area?” No, that’s just fairy lights to brighten the room a little bit. When pressed on all of these, she thought that maybe they were alarms, alerts or warnings about “critters.” For the most part, she’s been fairly normal today, nothing way out there like yesterday anyway.

3:30 PM – Mom is saying that she got a phone call to come back here a few days ago. She says she doesn’t know who called her, but she had to come here. Apparently she got a call to come back and help with the “critters.” She believes that she was living in an apartment after her divorce and that she just came back a few days ago after fleeing from here to escape from the “critters.” Yeah, I know this post is just everywhere, but I’m trying to keep up typing and talking to her. There’s a lot more going on than what I can type.

6:45 AM – Thing have been pretty quiet lately, much of that may be due to the fact that I’ve been working/sleeping through much of the time she’s been up, so I haven’t noticed more than the average forgetfulness, and mentions of critters. This morning I was asleep on the couch and woke up to her talking. She said, “Where’d they go? Did they leave me here thinking I was dead?” “It’s beautiful. She made it for my anniversary.” (She was holding an afghan that I’m assuming her mom made.) Next she said something about this being a quaint little apartment and then repeated, “Where’d they go? Did they leave me here alone thinking I was dead? Oh my God!” I don’t know how long she was there talking, but those are what woke me up and what I caught. She may have come downstairs to use the bathroom, but after she was done started with the off the wall comments. I pretended I was still asleep and she went back upstairs. I immediately sat up and started typing as soon as she way out of sight.

5:30 PM – Mom asked me, “Is it safe going upstairs?” I asked her why it wouldn’t be safe going up and she replied, “Because of all the critters outside.” I told her once again that no, there are NO critters outside and she she pumped her fist and said “yes” and went upstairs. On a positive note, I haven’t noticed her talking to inanimate objects yesterday or today. I think I may have been on the right track making a link with her not getting any/enough sleep and the hallucinations, or at least invisible people. The “critters” are still a problem no matter how much sleep she gets.

12:40 AM – And the fun continues! I heard her upstairs telling someone “See how the lights follow you around?” She then came downstairs and looked around, then went to the bathroom. While she was in there, it sounded like she was talking to someone again, but I couldn’t hear what she was saying over the noise I was making. When she came out, she said “It is raining HARD out there!” No Mom, it’s 21 degrees out there and not snowing either. She then looked at my jackets that are hanging up and said “Surely you’re not going to run out in the rain!” At this point I just start telling her to go to bed. After a few times of that, she stated that she might just go to bed and curl up into a ball. So she went back upstairs, but I have a feeling she’ll be back down again in a little while. I have a feeling the she’s going to be talking to herself all day today and I won’t be able to get any sleep for work tonight. Yay….

10:30 AM  –  Since Mom had been up and down stairs for much of the night, when she finally went to bed, I got around and took a shower and by 9:00 AM was heading to the store to get some groceries. When I got back home, I found Mom flipping through the Yellow Pages. When I asked her what was up, she replied that she was looking for “Critter control.” *Major eye-roll* When I asked her why she thought we needed “critter control,” she stated that even though it was cold out right now, the critters will be out REALLY SOON and we needed to get a handle on it right away! If I mentioned that there was nothing out there and we DON’T have a critter problem, her reply was “I pray you’re right.” *eye-roll again* Soooooo, my solution to THIS problem this morning was to hide all the phone books so she’s not trying to call “critter control” for her delusions. You might be thinking that maybe it would settle it for her if they did show up. Nope, sorry. Five minutes after they leave, she would forget about it and we’d be back to square 1. 

~3:00 PM  –  I heard Mom talking and I went to look to see who she was talking to and there was no one there. She told me, “I can’t hear what they are saying.” She turned around and then said, “Where’d they go?” She started looking around, but didn’t find them apparently.

6:20 PM  –  I walked out to the kitchen to see Mom sitting in her glider/rocker holding a bundle of something in her arms. She asked me, “Is it real?” I went over to look what she was holding and found 2 of my jackets wrapped together to look like a baby bundled up. After hanging my jackets back up, I started walking back to the living room and she followed me. When I stopped to see if she wanted something, she said something about things flying around upstairs that’s scaring her… She couldn’t describe it. I didn’t bother looking into it. The way she’s been today, it doesn’t surprise me that she’s seeing something else that’s not there. 

9:00 PM  –  I had laid down to take a nap and woke up to Mom talking again. This time she was talking to the coat rack. I didn’t catch everything she was saying, but she told me, “I don’t think he wants us all staying at the farm.” When I asked who she was talking about, she asked me “Don’t you hear the phone ringing?” Nope, phone wasn’t ringing. She turned around and walked into the kitchen and I sat back down on the couch to write this and she came in the living room and said, “There’s more of them in the corner in the kitchen. I don’t know what their intentions are.” Nope, you and I are still the only ones in the house, Mom. I can hear her out in the kitchen talking right now. I heard her say something about a bunch of people here and only one toilet and that could be a problem. She then came back out and tole me that there was a  little girl sitting in the kitchen. Mind you, this is all in the space of 10 minutes! I told her to go to bed, so she went to hang up her coat and I sat down again to continue writing and she started talking to my jackets! I sternly told her to go to bed. She’s been acting really goofy all day and I think it may be because she didn’t sleep last night for more than a couple of hours, if she slept at all. She went upstairs so I guess we will see if she stays up there and goes to bed.

11:00 PM  –  Mom came downstairs with a trash bag and said “Well, I’m moving back home.” I asked her what she’s talking about and she replied, “Mom met me at the train station and I’m going back home.” Grandma has been gone since October 20, 2006, so she didn’t meet her. “They’ve got some decent apartments don’t they? Ones without critters?” It doesn’t matter how many times she looks or how many times I let her know that there’s nothing out there, it always comes back to critters. There’s a lot more to the conversation, all of it really off the wall stuff. It basically boils down to her believing that she was just visiting here and that she didn’t think I wanted her to move in with me because the house is so small, but she was all over the place between moving back home and moving into an apartment. She didn’t understand that she has been living here for several years. 

2:45 PM  –  After several days it of being pretty quiet (it could be because of work and sleep that I haven’t seen much), today her imagination (delusions) has been more active. She came downstairs this morning when I was getting ready to go to sleep and mentioned seeing critters outside again. I tried to tell her there wasn’t anything out there and after some back and forth on it, she looked outside and seen that it had snowed some more overnight and commented that she seen why I said there was nothing out there. Then, she was seeing a puppy (or two) in the bushes next to the house, which after arguing with her, she finally went outside and looked for herself and seen that there wasn’t anything but bushes, a few leaves and snow out there. So anyway, I woke up (way too early) and found this note:

She’s now asking about how much money she’s getting from social security and mentioning again about starting out with a group of people here (Who???) and we are all that’s left.

6:05 AM  –  I was sitting quietly on the couch working on a blanket and watching youtube and Mom came downstairs and said “What’s going on?” She motioned for me to follow her upstairs where once again she looked around confused. I asked her what she seen and she replied, “I just came from here and there was a bunch of people up here.” She came back downstairs and looked around confused (evidently looking for that bunch of people that must have run down the stairs past her) and said, “and I still have a bedroom up there?” “Yes Mom, you just came down from your bedroom.” She decided that she would go back to bed and I agreed that it was probably a good idea. 

8:00 AM  –  Mom came down again and asked, “How do we stop this?” What’s that Mom? “How does he keep getting in?” At this point, I’m confused and not sure if she’s talking about a person or a “critter”, but she goes back upstairs and looks and I can hear her say “Well what do you know.” As I’m typing this, she’s just standing at the top of the stairs. After a few minutes of this she said, “Never mind. I’m losing it.” I’m guessing that both instances this morning was from waking up from a dream and not being able to distinguish between the dream and reality.

1:40 PM  –  I woke up to use the bathroom and discovered that Mom had made a pot of coffee again. The only reason she makes a pot is so she can give it to the critter catchers. When I confronted her about it she says, “They won’t show themselves to you, I give up.” 

5:00 PM  –  Mom walked into the living room and asked me, “You’re the only one left?” I replied that there hasn’t been anyone else here. She looked confused and sat down on the stairs.